


Proverbs

by pyrexprodigy



Series: Lay My Colors Bare [2]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: (so far) - Freeform, Ashen Romance | Auspistice, Black Romance, F/F, F/M, Feferi helps fix everyone's shit, Gen, Kanaya is too nice, M/M, MTF Rose Lalonde, MTF Terezi Pyrope, Pale Romance | Moirallegiance, Past Character Death, Post-Sburb, Red Romance, Sober Gamzee Makara, Terezi likes pissing off kanaya, Trans Female Character, Vriska is emotional, pesterfic, pesterlogs, polyamorous pale relationships, quadrant bullshit, upd8 compliant
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-06
Updated: 2015-06-06
Packaged: 2018-04-02 14:39:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,944
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4063729
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pyrexprodigy/pseuds/pyrexprodigy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Vriska is emotional. Kanaya doesn't want to deal with her. Rose and Terezi haven't had time to act like proper moirails because everyone's quadrants have gone fucking bonkers. And wait, why is Feferi solving this shit? When did she have anything to do with this? When did she  even come in?</p>
<p>Continuation of Dictionary Definition; picks up right after the events of said story. Vriska<>Kanaya-centric</p>
            </blockquote>





	Proverbs

**Author's Note:**

> Welcome to the next episode of "I hate coding more than anything ever." Seriously. If there are any quirk issues, blame it on how much I focused on coding. Also let's just go with "artistic license," since the trolls and the humans have been mixing for so long that there are bound to be quirk slip-ups on both sides.
> 
> Anyway!!! Thanks to my dear friend Tess for reading this through and giving me some feedback. Hopefully the next story will be less half-assed.
> 
> ((*Quietly adds an apology for the OOCness of the characters. Like Vriska. And Kanaya.*))

\-- terminallyCapricious [TC] began trolling arachnidsGrip [AG] --

AG: Oh fuck no.  
AG: I am not dealing with you right now.  
TC: hush up sister  
TC: AIN’T NO NEED TO BE GETTING YOUR FEAR ON  
AG: I’m not scared of you, you idiot. I just don’t want to deal with a half-wit. Especially at this particular moment!  
AG: 8ut I have a feeling you’re too stupid to understand that anyw8y.  
TC: now see  
TC: THAT’S JUST FUCKIN RUDE  
TC: you’ll get a brother all  
TC: OFFENDED  
AG: You seem slightly less coherent than usual. Has Lalonde 8urdened you with human soporifics again?  
TC: dunno the right answer to that question  
TC: WHAT I DO KNOW IS THAT A SPIDERBITCH COULD UP AND LEARN SOME MOTHERFUCKING MANNERS  
TC: if you know what i mean  
TC: AFTER ALL, MAYBE A SPIDERBITCH JUST LOST A QUADRANT CUZ SHE CAN’T KEEP HER POISONOUS TRAP SHUT  
TC: i could always sew that trap of hers shut  
AG: Fuck.  
AG: I don’t need to take this from you.  


\-- arachnidsGrip [AG] blocked terminallyCapricious [TC] --

 

\-- arachnidsGrip [AG] began trolling grimAuxiliatrix [GA] --

AG: You know what would 8e really great?  
GA: What  
AG: If clowns, like  
AG: Just stopped.  
AG: You know?  
GA: Has Gamzee Continued To Pursue A Black Relationship With You  
AG: No shit.  
AG: This time he 8rought Terezi into it.  
AG: Like, what the fuck????  
GA: Oh Are We Going To Be Talking About That Finally  
AG: NO.  
AG: I just wanted to mention it.  
GA: Good.  
GA: Because   
GA: Well Never Mind  
AG: Wow, you’re no fun.  
AG: I didn’t know you were the type to keep secrets!  
GA: It Isnt A Secret  
GA: Rose Requested That I Employ Caution When Bringing It Up With You  
GA: I Took That To Mean I Should Wait For You To Find Out From Another Source  
AG: So, 8asically, a secret.  
AG: 8lah 8lah whatever. Not what I’m here for.  
GA: What Are You Here For Vriska  
GA: We Arent On The Best Of Terms  
AG: Sheesh, I thought we were done with that.  
AG: I mean, you’re the one who 8roke up with me for no reason! You’re the one who never told me what I did and refused to talk to me! I should 8e upset.  
AG: 8ut you know what? I forgive you! 8ecause the g8me was a mess and whatever it was had to 8e too 8ig for me to deal with.  
AG: Even though I was, you know, your moirail.  
GA: Maybe You Should Discuss It With One Of Your Quadrant Mates  
GA: You Know  
GA: Someone Who Cares  
GA: Oh Wait  
AG: ...That was kind of cold, Kanaya.  
AG: I mean, normally I’d applaude it! 8ut seeing as Terezi literally just dumped me...  
AG: Plus, she did it the same way you did! She didn’t even tell me what I did!  
GA: You Didnt Do Anything  
AG: So you do know????????  
AG: And why won’t you tell me?  
GA: Its As A Courtesy To Rose  
AG: What does Rose have to do with it?  
AG: I was pretty sure those two h8ed each other.  
GA: It Seems You Were Wrong  
GA: They Have Always Been Close  
GA: They Often Discussed Their Shared Gender Experiences  
GA: Did You Not Know This?  
AG: I didn’t know it was such a 8ig deal!  
AG: I don’t understand why they’d talk about it. 8eing a 8oy or a girl or a whatever doesn’t matter at all.  
AG: Like, okay. Why talk about wanting 8reasts when you can just, I don’t know, not worry a8out that?  
AG: Sure, Terezi’s a girl and I respect that, 8ut why does it matter???????? Why do they want to talk a8out it????  
GA: I Dont Think You Understand How They Feel Vriska  
GA: I Dont Think Anyone But Other Transgender Individuals Can  
AG: So did Terezi 8r8k up with me 8ecause I didn’t understand this? I tried! I tried to talk a8out it with her!  
GA: I Think You Should Stop Trying To Make Her Gender Issues About You  
GA: This Is A Terezi Thing And She Will Pick Who To Romance Based On The Support She Needs  
GA: You Can Be Lacking In The Support Field You Know  
AG: 8ut she said she loves me. So I don’t get why she would end the rel8tionship if she still loves me.   
AG: She could have talked to me a8out the gender thing! I would 8e willing to listen.  
GA: The Two Of You Had Many Issues  
GA: Not Just The Ones Related To Your Reluctance And Her Confusion  
GA: From What I Gather The Pale Quadrant Was Never For The Two Of You  
GA: There Was Too Much Shared History And Pain   
GA: Most Of Which The Both Of You Inflicted On Each Other  
GA: I Think Terezi Also Found Issues With Your Little Meeting On The Meteor Oh So Long Ago  
AG: When John punched me out?  
GA: When She Was Going To Kill You  
GA: Thats A Lot Of Guilt Especially For A Pyrope  
GA: As We Are Both Aware The Pyrope Line Is An Emotionally Turbulent Lot  
AG: Just 8ecause Latula has to take some stupid meds for her mental shit doesn’t mean Terezi’s messed up.  
GA: There  
GA: Thats Not How You Help A Moirail  
GA: You Fix Them  
GA: You Let Them Fix You  
AG: I already know I’m fucked up, Kanaya.   
AG: You know, that’s pro8a8ly why she left me.  
AG: I’m just kind of fucked up. You and her knew that.  
AG: I’m so fucked up that the shitty clown is the only one who’s interested in me.  
GA: Vriska  
AG: What?  
GA: Talk To Rose About This  
GA: Because While I Dont Find You Agreeable As Of Late I Dont Want You To Suffer Because Of Something You Didnt Do  
GA: And Rose Can Explain Since I Have A Feeling Terezi Has Generally Been Ignoring You Lately  
AG: Thanks for the heads up, Kanaya.  
AG: I’ll go do that.  


\-- arachnidsGrip [AG] ceased trolling grimAuxiliatrix [GA] --

 

\-- arachnidsGrip [AG] began trolling tentacleTherapist [TT] --

AG: Lalonde.  
TT: Serket.  
TT: What brings a fellow god of light to my little corner of the internet?  
AG: Spare me the unnecessary 8anter.  
AG: Why did Kanaya tell me to talk to you?  
TT: You’ll have to elaborate.  
TT: I can’t imagine why she’d propose we discuss anything. I was under the impression that she preferred the two of us remain distanced.  
TT: A shame. Being in cahoots with you would be an experience. Just think of what we could accomplish.  
AG: You know, if we joined forces for a reason I might consider it. May8e to mess with   
AG: Never mind.  
AG: The point is, I was going all self-loathing 8ecause of that shitty 8reakup and Kanaya told me to talk to you.  
AG: Why would she tell me to talk to you?  
TT: Has Terezi not told you?  
AG: She apparently has not! Who’da thunk it?  
TT: Hm.  
TT: The sarcasm is acknowledged and unappreciated.   
AG: Fucking fantastic.   
AG: Now get the hell on with it. I’d rather not talk to you any longer than necessary right now.  
TT: Shortly after breaking up with you, Terezi approached me with the intention of filling a quadrant.  
TT: I accepted.  
TT: We are now moirails.  


\-- arachnidsGrip [AG] ceased trolling tentacleTherapist [TT] --

 

\-- arachnidsGrip [AG] began trolling grimAuxiliatrix [GA] --

AG: Kanaya  
GA: What Is It  
AG: It’s  
AG: Never mind. This was a mistake.  


\-- arachnidsGrip [AG] ceased trolling grimAuxiliatrix [GA] --

 

\-- arachnidsGrip [AG] unblocked terminallyCapricious [TC] --

\-- arachnidsGrip [AG] began trolling terminallyCapricious [TC] --

AG: Alright.  
AG: What do you want from me, clown?  
AG: Do you want me to h8 you? 8ecause you’ve already got that!  
TC: it’s a secret  
TC: THOUGH MAYBE IF YOU ALL UP AND ASK WITH SOME FUCKING MANNERS I MIGHT OBLIGE  
AG: I’m not playing this g8me with you, 8rainrot. I’m never playing another damn g8me with you ever!!!!!!!! The last one turned out shitty enough.  
AG: And since when did you grow a fucking 8ack8one? Haven’t you always 8een terrified of me? I’d love to see you fucking try saying half this shit to my face, freak.  
TC: couldn’t have terezi now could i  
TC: HAVE TO WORK WITH THE SECOND BEST  
TC: even if she’s lacking  
TC: LACKING MORE THAN HER WARMER SISTER  
TC: your blood shrieks less than hers at least  
AG: And here we go with the hemopho8ic 8ullshit!  
AG: I get that I’m second! I’m always the second choice!!!!!!!!  
AG: 8ut at least I’m actually someone’s choice. Unlike you.  
AG: Karkat ditched you the human rejects, and so did Tavros, and me? Well, I was never interested in your pathetic attempts anyway.  
TC: DON’T GO SPEAKING ABOUT TAVBRO LIKE YOU CARE ABOUT HIM  
TC: you don’t  
TC: AND WHAT’S MORE  
TC: you don’t know a thing  
TC: YOU DON’T KNOW A MOTHERFUCKING THING  
TC: not a goddamn thing spider sister  
AG: School me, then. What don’t I know?  
AG: I’m fucking Vriska Serket, and you’re some orphan piece of shit who’s lusus didn’t give half a fucking crap a8out him. Hell, your lusus was worse than mine! Did he just get lost or did he just h8 raising you so much that he left?  
AG: Tell me, how long did you wait for his stupid horned head to appear 8ack on the horizon, ready to apologize for leaving you alone? You would have gladly taken him b8ck, wouldn’t you?  
AG: Fucking pathetic.  
AG: Fucking.  
AG: Pathetic.  


\-- arachnidsGrip [AG] ceased trolling terminallyCapricious [TC] --

 

\-- grimAuxiliatrix [GA] began trolling arachnidsGrip [AG] --

GA: Vriska  
GA: What Happened  
GA: You Arent Responding And I Find That Concerning  
GA: Vriska Please This Is Unnecessary  
GA: Dont Mistake This For Pale Approaches But You May Talk To Me  
GA: If You Must  
GA: Because I Would Really Prefer To Avoid Another Serket Episode  
GA: And Im Sure There Is Some Way We Can Make You Feel Better About This Situation  
GA: I Know Youre Online So Dont Ignore Me  
GA: God I Promised Myself Id Never Follow You Around Like This Again  
GA: Vriska This Isnt Fair  
GA: Vriska  
GA: Vriska  
GA: Vriska Fucking Serket You Have Three Minutes To Respond Before I Walk To Your Damn Hive Myself  
AG: Aw. You do care a8out me!  
GA: Im Sure You Cant Blame Me For Worrying  
AG: Of course not, Fussyfangs!!!!!!!! I’m actually glad you came 8ack.  
GA: Came Back  
GA: What Do You Mean  
AG: Pft, it means you forgive me for whatever I did. Which is gr8, 8ecause even I can admit when I need someone!  
AG: Lucky for you, pun intended, I have just the quadrant open for you when the time comes since my ex dumped me on the cur8 like gar8age!  
GA: The Upbeat Way You Said That Makes Me Uncomfortable  
GA: You Dont Sound Fine To Me  
AG: I never said anything a8out fine.   
AG: And you didn’t deny the quadrant thing, so I’d say my work here is officially complete.  
AG: See ya around, Fussy!  


\-- arachnidsGrip [AG] ceased trolling grimAuxiliatrix [GA] --

 

\-- grimAuxiliatrix [GA] began trolling gallowsCalibrator [GC] --

GA: Excuse The Interruption Of What Im Sure Are Very Important Shenanigans But I Have Some Questions For You  
GC: WOW, WH4T 4 SURPR1S3. YOU’R3 4CTU4LLY T4LK1NG TO M3  
GC: TH1S 1S TH3 F1RST T1M3 1N W33KS!  
GC: W3 R34LLY DON’T 1NT3R4CT WH3N W3 DON’T L1V3 TOG3TH3R, HUH?  
GA: While I Agree That Is Not At All The Reason I Approached You  
GA: Meaning That This Conversation Should Redirect If You Didnt Get That Hint  
GC: Y34H 1 GU3SS3D 1T WOULDN’T B3 FOR 4NYTH1NG C4SU4L  
GC: SO H4S VR1SK4 PULL3D YOU B4CK 1N Y3T?  
GA: Vriska Is Actually The Topic Of My Questioning  
GA: As I Have Spent Less Time With Her Over The Past Five Years Since The Initial Start Of The Journey I Figured It WOuld Be Best To Ask You Questions ABout The Current Vriska  
GC: UH, 4LR1GHT  
GC: TH4T’S NOT 4WKW4RD 4T 4LL OR 4NYTH1NG  
GA: Why Would It Be Awkward  
GC: 1 DON’T KNOW, 1 W4S K1ND OF UND3R TH3 1MPR3SS1ON TH4T YOU W3R3 ST1LL SOM3WH4T 1NT3R3ST3D 1N VR1SK4 WH3N SH3 4ND 1 GOT TOG3TH3R  
GC: PLUS... TH3 G1RL WHO W4S GO1NG TO K1LL H3R WON OUT OV3R YOU.   
GC: YOU C4N’T S4Y YOU 4R3N’T BOTH3R3D BY MY MURD3R 4TT3MPT  
GA: I Have No Room To Talk  
GC: Y34H BUT TH4T W4S 3R1D4N. H3 H4D 4LR34DY K1LL3D TWO OF US. VR1SK4 M1GHT H4V3 OTH3RW1S3 B33N STOPP3D H4D 1 NOT ST4BB3D H3R 1N TH3 B4CK, WH1CH 1 LUCK1LY D1DN’T DO  
GC: SO M4YB3 TH3 MURD3R 4TT3MPT DO3SN’T BOTH3R YOU. BUT DO3S TH3 T4RG3T BOTH3R YOU?  
GA: I Cant Say It Settles Well With Me Even After So Long  
GA: Im Just Glad That Our Timeline Succeeded With Vriskas Survival  
GC: SO YOU ST1LL C4R3 4BOUT H3R  
GA: Dont You?  
GC: NOT TH3 W4Y YOU S33M TO  
GC: 4ND 1’M SORRY 1 W4ST3D TH4T T1M3 FOR BOTH OF US. BUT FROM NOW ON 1’M NOT L3TT1NG YOU BL4M3 M3 FOR 4NY OF VR1SK4’S SH1T OR TH1NGS TH4T H4PP3N3D ON TH3 M3T3OR  
GC: 1 KNOW YOU DON’T L1K3 M3 MUCH BUT S1NC3 W3 BOTH C4R3 4BOUT ROS3 4ND VR1SK4 L3T’S NOT G3T 1NTO TH4T  
GA: It Wouldnt Lead To That  
GC: BUT 1F 1T D1D, 1T WOULD B3 4 COMPL1C4T1ON  
GC: 1T’S B3ST 1F W3 WORK OUT OUR P1TY QU4DR4NTS F1RST  
GA: I Hate That Youre Being The Kind And Logical One  
GC: Y34H, 1 DON’T L1K3 1T  
GC: 1T SM3LLS B3TT3R ON YOU >:]  
GA: Urgh  
GC: H3 H3  
GC: OK4Y 1’LL STOP B31NG N1C3 TO YOU NOW  
GC: YOU V1R1D14N N1GHTM4R3  
GA: You Flatter Me So  
GC: 4NYW4Y, YOU W3R3 4SK1NG 4BOUT VR1SK4. HOW M4Y 1 B3 OF S3RV1C3?  
GA: I Am Wondering If You Could Tell Me How She Chooses To Act Out Nowadays  
GA: Her Preferred Method Of Dealing With Emotions When We Were Young Was Primarily Tormenting Tavros  
GA: I Assume She No Longer Does That  
GC: W3LL SH3 D1D K1LL H1M. TH3Y DON’T R34LLY T4LK 4NYMOR3  
GC: SURPR1S1NGLY 3NOUGH, 4R4D14 H3LP3D TH3M SORT THROUGH TH1NGS B3FOR3 TH3Y P4RT3D W4YS  
GC: SH3’S SOM3TH1NG 3LS3, 1 T3LL YOU  
GA: Yes Well I Will Have To Take Your Word For It As We Do Not Interact Much Nor Have We Ever  
GA: Though I Find It Prudent To Mention That I Have Nothing Against Aradia  
GA: I Quite Like Her Hair  
GC: PFT H4H4H4  
GC: OF COURS3 YOU DO  
GA: I Dont See The Humor In That  
GC: N31TH3R DO 1  
GA: terezi  
GC: 4LR1GHT, 4LR1GHT  
GC: TO 4NSW3R YOUR QU3ST1ON, SH3 ST1LL PR3TTY MUCH T4K3S 1T OUT ON OTH3R P3OPL3. W3 ST4RT3D STR1F1NG TO L3T H3R R3L34S3 TH4T P3NT UP 4NG3R 4ND 3N3RGY BUT SH3’D PROB4BLY F4LL B4CK ON WH4T SH3 KN3W FROM B3FOR3  
GC: THOUGH H3R V1CT1M WOULD NOT B3 T4VROS  
GA: Who Then  
GC: MY B3ST GU3SS, 4ND TH1S M1GHT NOT B3 R1GHT BUT 1T PROB4BLY 1S B3C4US3 LOOK 4T WHO YOU’R3 T4LK1NG TO FOR CHR1ST’S S4K3, 1S G4MZ33  
GA: Ah Yes  
GA: They Collided Aggressively Earlier To My Understanding  
GC: 4LL OF VR1SK4’S COLL1S1ONS 4R3 V1OL3NT  
GA: Yes I Suppose Thats True  
GC: 4ND 1F H3 4LR34DY D1D SOM3TH1NG TO P1SS H3R OFF SH3’S PROB4BLY GON3 B4CK TO 4BUS1NG H1S STUP1D 4SS 4S 4 R3SULT  
GC: WH1CH H3 H4D PL3NTY OF ON TH3 M3T3OR. PLUS, 1 PROM1S3D K4RK4T 1’D K33P H3R FROM DO1NG TH4T 4NYMOR3  
GC: NOT TH4T TH3 CLOWN 1SN’T P3RF3CTLY C4P4BL3 OF COV3R1NG H1S OWN 4SS, BUT 1 TH1NK VR1SK4 W4S TH3 ONLY P3RSON WHO 3V3R SC4R3D H1M. M4YB3 F3F3R1, BUT SH3 W4S TOO CUDDLY TO B3 SC4RY HON3STLY  
GC: BUT 1F H3 GOT SOM3 UNR3STR41N3D S3RK3T R4G3... W3LL, H3’S PROB4BLY R3M3B3R3D WHY H3 W4S SC4R3D OF H3R SO LONG 4GO  
GA: Didnt She Lock Him In A Fridge  
GC: TH4T W4S L1K3 4N 3NT1R3 SW33P 4GO K4N4Y4  
GA: Would You Forgive And Forget Getting Locked In A Fridge?  
GC: ...YOU H4V3 JUST WON YOUR C4S3, M1SS M4RY4M  
GC: H3R HONOR4BL3 TYR4NNY ST4NDS DOWN. MOM3NT4R1LY  
GA: That Is Incredibly Outdated You Know  
GC: *TH3 JUDG3 G4SPS, TRULY SHOCK3D 4T TH1S D3V3LOPM3NT*  
GC: 1T 1S???  
GA: Must We Do This Now  
GC: YOU ST4RT3D 1T, M1SS M1NT SW1RL  
GA: So Are We Going To Do Anything To Keep Her From Making Her Relationship With Gamzee Something Blacker  
GC: SH3 COULD H4NDL3 1T  
GA: I Never Implied She Couldnt  
GA: I Mean That Karkat Will Likely Not Appreciate Her Spewing Foul Vernacular At His Best Friend Especially Considering Her Poisonous Nature  
GA: Just Think Of What She Might Bring Up To Use Against Him  
GA: Things Of  
GA: The Lusus Nature  
GC: 1T’S R34LLY NOT MY PROBL3M. 1 N3V3R L1K3D G4MZ33, 4ND TH3 F4CT TH4T H3 4LMOST K1LL3D 4LT-M3 DO3SN’T R34LLY H3LP M3 F33L SYMP4TH3T1C  
GC: 4ND 1T’S NOT MY JOB TO CONTROL VR1SK4 4NYMOR3. W3 4R3N’T P4L3, 1F YOU R3M3MB3R. 4ND 1 1NT3ND TO K33P 1T TH4T W4Y  
GA: I Suspect There Is More To This Than You Are Providing Currently  
GC: YOU’LL H4V3 TO W41T 4ND S33, MY D34R SYLPH  
GC: BUT 1’D S4Y TH4T 1S MOST D3F1N1T3LY TH3 C4S3 >:]  
GA: Then What Do You Propose Is Done About The Situation  
GA: A Proper Kismessitude Cannot Be Made If One Party Continues To Abuse Another  
GA: Vriska Needs Someone Who Can Stand Up To Her No Matter What  
GA: If Gamzee Is Still Scared Of Her Then That Is Not Fair To Either Of Them  
GC: NOT MY JOB, K4N4Y4  
GC: 1F YOU’R3 SO WORR23D 4BOUT 1T, 4USP1ST1Z3   
GA: But  
GC: HOLD 1T  
GC: DO YOU NOT *W4NT* TO B3 TH31R M3D14TOR?  
GC: K4N4Y4 M4RY4M 1S 4CT1V3LY CHOOS1NG NOT TO 4CT 1N TH3 4SH3N QU4DR4NT. TH1S 1S GOLD3N  
GA: Yes That Is What I Am Saying  
GA: I Dont Want To Be Involved With Either Of Them In That Quadrant  
GA: Personally I Am Also Not Fond Of Gamzee And It Would Be Unfair To Act As A Mediator Who Prefers A Certain Party In The Relationship  
GC: OOOOR 1S 1T TH4T YOU W4NT ON3 OF TH3M 1N 4N 3NT1R3LY D1FF3R3NT QU4DR4NT?  
GC: TH1NK 4BOUT 1T. 1 DON’T C4R3 4BOUT TH3 4NSW3R  
GC: GOOD LUCK W1TH 1T, THOUGH  
GA: Wait  


\-- gallowsCalibrator [GC] is now an idle troll! --

GA: You Didnt Even Suggest Someone  
GA: Fuck  


\-- grimAuxiliatrix [GA] ceased trolling gallowsCalibrator [GC] --

 

CURRENT grimAuxiliatrix [CGA] RIGHT NOW opened memo on board Solving Conciliatory Shenanigans With The Sylph Of Space

CGA: Its Been So Long Since I Properly Touched This Memo  
CGA: Would It Be Considered A Miracle That Everyone Has Seemed To Work Out Their Own Problems Over The Years  
CGA: Dont Answer That Gamzee  
CGA: To The Point Then  
CGA: I Would Like Assistance With A Certain Issue  
CGA: I Find Myself Unable To Mediate Between Two Individuals Because Of Circumstances That Are Beyond My Control  
CGA: It Would Be Nothing Short Of Miraculous If Someone Would Kindly Step Forward To Aid Me  
CURRENT arsenicCatnip [CAC] RIGHT NOW responded to memo  
CAC: :33 < is it purrhaps rose and vriska then?  
CGA: No  
CGA: Why Would You Think That  
CAC: :33 < no reason! its just heart player intuition  
CURRENT timaeusTestified [CTT] RIGHT NOW responded to memo  
CTT: It really isn’t.  
CTT ceased responding to memo  
CAC: :33 < well ac think your a dirty liar if you say you cant s33 the tension there  
CAC: :33 < i can help if you want kanaya  
CGA: Thank You For The Offer But  
CGA: It Might Be Best If You Sit This One Out  
CGA: I Can Explain Later  
CAC: :33 < thats purrfectly fine! im sure i can find another way to amuse myself  
CGA: The Understanding Is Appreciated  
CAC: :33 < let me know how it goes! i might be adding another ship to the wall  
CAC: :33 < is rooster canon yet?  
CGA: Rooster?  
CAC: :33 < nothing!!  
CAC ceased responding to memo  
CURRENT carcinoGeneticist [CCG] RIGHT NOW responded to memo  
CCG: JADE WILL DO IT  
CURRENT gardenGnostic [CGG] RIGHT NOW responded to memo  
CGG: jade will not!!  
CGG: jade finds the idea mildly intimidating and worrisome considering she has no idea who she will be working with!  
CGG: because if its vriska i will cry  
PAST arachnidsGrip [PAG] 7 WEEKS AGO responded to memo  
PAG: :::;)  
CURRENT apocalypseArisen [CAA] RIGHT NOW responded to memo  
CAA: this is an automated message! to avoid confusing timelines and once again ending the world as we know it, we have taken precautions against crossed timeline communications. we are afraid that we now have to ban you from communicating on this tier of time! please wait until you naturally reach this point, or you might never do so. again, please respect the natural progression of time and refrain from involving yourself in past or future events  
CAA banned PAG from responding to memo  
CAA ceased responding to memo  
CCG: SOLLUX WAS GOING TO USE HIS ACCOUNT TO DO THAT  
CCG: IT WAS DEEMED UNNECESSARY AND INFURIATING  
CGG: mainly because sollux is rude  
CGG: aradias message was much nicer  
CGA: I Assume Both Present And Past Vriska Were Informed This Would Happen If She Chose To Interrupt Timelines  
CCG: PROBABLY. IT WOULDN’T SURPRISE ME.  
CURRENT turntechGodhead [CTG] RIGHT NOW responded to memo  
CTG: i think jade can do it  
CCG: SEE?  
CGG: traitor  
CTG: jade  
CTG: yall got all that teamwork shit going on  
CTG: i mean you managed to get karkat and me more than friendly CGG: well yeah  
CGG: but we never put a quadrant label to that!!  
CGG: it was just ‘okay i need to keep my best friends from kill each other’ not ‘i need to keep my best friends from angrily making out with each other’  
CGA: That Is Mostly Incorrect  
CGA: While An Auspistice Can Come Into A Relationship If Neither Party Wishes To Enter In A Kismesitude Their Primary Job Is To Keep An Unhealthy Black Relationship From Developing  
CGA: That Is What We Require Help With Here  
CGG: oh  
CGG: well thanks for the suggestion but no thanks  
CGG: ive honestly never much understood the caliginous quadrants  
CGG: i like red and pale much better :D  
CTG: damn skippy  
CCG: SHUT UP, DAVE.  
CCG: I HAVE FAILED AS A MOIRAIL AND AS AN EDUCATOR. EVEN FUCKING *JOHN* LEARNED TO INCORPORATE BLACK AND ASHEN INTO HIS ROMANCE  
CTG: karkat dude chill  
CTG: considering we broke the bounds of your shitty quadrangled romance system long ago i dont think being bothered about it matters  
CGA: Ah Yes  
CGA: How Is That Going By The Way  
CCG: HORRIBLE  
CTG: great  
CGG: they fight a lot  
CGA: They Always Have  
CGA: Frankly Im Surprised You Managed To Wrangle Them In  
CGA: Considering Their Shared Emotional Constipation  
CTG: jades really good at that shit  
CTG: fuck i started crying when she told me to shape my shit up and tell the little shit how i felt  
CTG: not that she could see  
CGG: awwwww  
CCG: SO YOU STOLE THAT SPEECH FROM HER, THEN.  
CTG: what no  
CGG: probably!  
CGA: ?   
CCG: I’LL CATCH YOU UP LATER, KANAYA  
CTG: aw babe  
CTG: are we not satisfying your pale yearnings  
CTG: we can do better  
CCG: NO, STRIDER. THIS IS NOT “KARKAT TALKING TO HIS POTENTIAL DIAMOND.” THIS IS “KARKAT TALKING TO A GOOD FRIEND THAT HE LIKES TALKING TO,” YOU EXCESSIVE MORON.  
CURRENT arsenicCatnip [CAC] RIGHT NOW responded to memo  
CAC: :33 < do my eyes deceive me or did someone just confess to having two moirails???  
CAC: :33 < ive got to update my shipping wall!  
CCG: OH FOR FUCK’S SAKE.  
CAC: :33 < just for refurence is it jade/karkat/dave or jade/karkat/dave/jade  
CGG: why am i there twice?  
CAC: :33 < beclaws it means its a relationship with all of you, not just with karkat in the center!  
CTG: the second one  
CAC: :33 < *ac squeals with excitement and quickly exists the memo in order to make an impurrtant update to her wall*  
CAC ceased responding to memo  
CGA: Well As Enlightening As This Has Been I Have Yet To Find Someone Who Will Be Of Help  
CGA: I Am Sorry But Unless You Plan On Contributing To The Topic Stated Above I Will Have To Ask You To Leave  
CGG: :O  
CGG: sorry kanaya! that was pretty rude of us  
CTG: yo no biggie  
CTG: consider me gone maryam  
CTG ceased responding to memo  
CGG ceased responding to memo  
CCG: WELL, GOOD LUCK, KANAYA. I’D OFFER BUT I’M PROBABLY ONE OF THE PEOPLE BEING MEDIATED SO.  
CCG: ACTUALLY I KNOW I’M NOT BUT SINCE IT’S MORE LIKELY THAN ME *MEDIATING* MYSELF, I’LL BE ON MY WAY  
CGA: See You Karkat  
CCG ceased responding to memo  
CGA: This Has Been An Adventure In Futility So Far  
CGA: Adventures In Futility Have Never Been My Strong Suit  
CURRENT tentacleTherapist [CTT] RIGHT NOW responded to memo  
CTT: Whatever you’re up to, I believe in you.  
CGA: Thank You Darling  
CTT: Perhaps it would help if you revealed the pair in question?  
CTT: You can always block them. It’s your memo, Kanaya.  
CGA: The Element Of Surprise Would Be Useful Though  
CTT: You mean you’d like to spring it on them so they don’t have a chance to escape.  
CGA: Well Yes  
CTT: Feferi then.  
CURRENT cuttlefishCuller [CCC] RIGHT NOW responded to memo  
CCC: W)(at is t)(is I )(ear about an INT-ERV-ENTION?  
CTT: In the loosest sense of the word, yes. I suppose it’s an intervention.  
CCC: W)(ale, you could )(ave just come to me first, silly! I’ve always wanted to try my fin out at the as)(en quadrant!  
CGA: So You Have No Experience  
CCC: )(mmmmm... A little.  
CCC: Admittedly not a lot, t)(oug)(! I mediated between Sollux and Roxy for a w)(ile before t)(at worked out. O)(! And Jade and I )(ad a bit of a t)(ing.  
CCC: It wasn’t reely as)(en, but someone kelped us get along betta. So I know some tricks!  
CTT: I think you’re the perfect candidate. Presuming Kanaya agrees.  
CGA: Well  
CCC: PL-EAS-E? I reely need to work on this quadrant. If not now, t)(en w)(en? I minnow I won’t get as good as YOU, Kanaya, but I’d LOV-E to kelp out if I can.  
CGA: Alright  
CGA: I Will Contact You Outside The Memo  
CCC: 38D  
CCC: T)(ANK YOU!!  
CCC: T)(is is so glubbing exciting. I )(ave an eeling t)(at t)(is will go SWIMMINGLY   
CCC ceased responding to memo  
CTT: She arranged that sentence that way on porpoise.  
CGA: Rose Please  
CTT: I saw the opperchtunaty and I hooked it, Kanaya. There are a tuna these puns if you sink aboat it.  
CGA: I Am Wearing My Scolding Face Right Now  
CGA: Do You See This Rose  
CGA: I Dont Approve  
CTT: ;)  
CGA banned CTT from responding to memo  


CURRENT grimAuxiliatrix [CGA] closed memo  


 

\-- cuttlefishCuller [CC] began trolling grimAuxiliatrix [GA] --  


CC: So!  
CC: W)(o will I be assisting you wit)(?  
GA: Vriska And Gamzee  
GA: I Hope That Isnt A Problem  
CC: Naut at all! I’ve never )(ad a problem wit)( Gamzee or Vriska.  
CC: T)(oug)( Sollux probubbly wouldn’t like it... Screw it! It’ll be a splas)(!  
CC: Tell me w)(at t)(e problem has been.  
GA: Im Not Sure If Youve Heard About The Recent Breakup  
GA: Terezi And Vriska Are No Longer Moirails   
GA: Terezi And Rose Are Pale  
GA: Vriska Didnt Take It Well And May Be Having Issues With Gamzee  
CC: MAY be??  
CC: So you don’t minnow?  
GA: Well Not Exactly  
GA: I Suspect  
GA: From What I Know Of Her During Our Time As Moirails She Has A Habit Of Redirecting Her Anger Especially The Anger Her Harbours Towards Hershellf  
GA: Herself  
CC: You sound pretty concerned.  
CC: Maybe you otter ask Vriska about it yours)(ellf before swimming all up in her busifis)(?  
GA: Shes being Extremely Uncooperative  
CC: And you are SURPRIS-ED?  
CC: T)(is is Vriska glubbing Serket you know.  
GA: Shes Also Been Extremely Self Deprecating  
GA: I Rarely Witness That  
CC: )(u)(  
CC: Yea)(, I can agree wit)( t)(at! I don’t ofin witness Vriska in one of t)(ose moods.   
CC: )(ave you talked to Gamzee at all? Maybe t)(ey don’t need an ausfishtice at all.  
CC: After all, do you efin know if the two of t)(em )(ave )(ad problems?  
GA: There Was An Aggressive Run In Earlier  
GA: But Terezi Agreed That This Might Help  
GA: Since She Was So Clearly Against Helping Otherwise  
CC: So you want your matesprit’s moray-eel to connive with )(er ex-palemate?  
GA: No  
GA: I Mean  
GA: I Feel As Though Shes Being Awful Dismissive Of Vriska For Someone Who Claims To Love Her  
GA: Shes Being Entirely Too Difficult  
GA: She Wont Even Talk To Her  
CC: But you seem to be okay wi)( t)(at for t)(e most part.  
CC: O)(! I get somefin now!  
CC: You’re totally jellyfis)( t)(at the gill w)(o broke up wit)( Vriska and got toget)(er wit)( your matesprit is t)(e only one w)(o can talk to Vriska rig)(t now! Or at least t)(at’s w)(at you t)(ink.  
CC: But was team Scourge ever meant for pale? T)(e rest of us never saw t)(at working out.  
GA: And What Would You Know About It  
CC: A lot, acts)(elly!  
CC: Eridan and I were never meant for pale, eit)(er! But it was betta to be toget)(er in a quadrant t)(at didn’t WORK t)(an lose eac)(otter.  
CC: I don’t t)(ink Vriska ever reely liked Terezi t)(at way. S)(e just didn’t want to lose )(er again. Maybe t)(at murder attempt on t)(e meteor five years ago opened her eyes to t)(at!  
CC: After all, s)(e knew you wouldn’t take )(er back.  
GA: Thats  
GA: How Would You Even Know  
GA: You Were Dead  
CC: But I still knew some of t)(e t)(ings t)(at went on! And w)(en people died, I did run into t)(em.  
CC: In t)(at final battle, you know Vriska died.   
CC: We talked.  
GA: What About  
CC: I’m not T)(AT terribubble, kanaya! Some secrets I )(ave to keep.  
CC: But t)(ere was a time on the meteor, before I died, w)(en Vriska offered to listen to me. During the Sollux and Eridan affairs. I guess s)(e t)(oug)(t I mig)(t be )(aving a )(ard time.. S)(e was genuine! And I kind of t)(rew it right back in )(er face.  
CC: Everyone thought I was the nice one, you know. Even Vriska.   
CC: So I owed her that when she died.  
GA: Thats  
GA: Er  
CC: ANYWAY  
CC: So you t)(ink t)(at t)(ere’s reely a problem wit)( t)(ose two?   
CC: Because I t)(ink you s)(ould stop floundering and talk to Vriska! S)(e obviously wants to talk to you aboat it; s)(e’s just reely bad at letting )(ershellf be )(onest.  
CC: Plus, s)(e’s just been betrayed by ANOT)(-ER moray-eel. It’s pikely t)(at s)(e’s just scared.  
GA: When Did You Become An Expert  
CC: I’ve )(ad a LOT of moray-eels, kanaya. You start to understand at aboat t)( sixt)( one.  
GA: Wait  
GA: Seriously  
CC: Y-ES, seariously. I was dead for a long time, you know. T)(ere were a lot more fis)( in the dreambubbles t)(an in t)(e sea, if you know w)(at I mean.  
CC: 3PD  
CC: T)(at’s a winky face by the way. It’s )(ard to do wit)( goggles...   
GA: I Would Assume So  
GA: Alright  
GA: I Will Talk To Vriska  
CC: Y-ES!!  
CC: Let me know if you do need me after all.  


\-- cuttlefishCuller [CC] ceased trolling grimAuxiliatrix [GA] --  


 

\-- grimAuxiliatrix [GA] began trolling tentacleTherapist [TT] --  


GA: I Have No Idea What My Life Has Become  
TT: So I assume your talk with Feferi was helpful?  
GA: In The Strangest Of Ways Yes  


\-- grimAuxiliatrix [GA] ceased trolling tentacleTherapist [TT] --  


 

\-- grimAuxiliatrix [GA] began trolling arachnidsGrip [AG] --  


GA: I Want To Talk  
GA: And No You Wont Be Running Off Or Lying Or Making Excuses For Your Emotional Constipation  
GA: Because I Get All Of That Vriska  
GA: But Do You Get That I Am Willing To Listen  
AG: Just like old times then, huh.  
GA: No  
GA: Because Ill Let You Help Me With My Issues Too  
GA: Look  
GA: I  
GA: I Understand Holding Onto A Quadrant Because You Dont Want To Lose Someone  
GA: But You Didnt Lose Terezi  
GA: Shes Not Your Moray Eel Anymore But She Still Cares About You  
GA: And You Cant Take Out That Frustration On Other People  
GA: So Let Me Help You Again Okay  
GA: Even Though We Arent Even Really Friends Or Anything I Do Still Care  
AG: Did you just say moray-eel?  
AG: Holy shit.  
AG: That’s the 8est thing I’ve heard all day.  
GA: Vriska Im Serious  
AG: Yeah, yeah.  
AG: So what are you s8ying? You want to me moirails again? I thought that ship s8led sweeps ago.  
GA: We Both Changed  
GA: Id Be Willing To Try Until  
GA: Well Until You Can Manage Without Me  
AG: Kanaya.  
AG: I’ve never 8een a8le to manage without you. You’ve seen me try.  
GA: Maybe We Can Change That  
GA: I Have A Question First Though  
AG: Fire away.  
GA: Did You Troll Gamzee Today  
GA: Perhaps Rather Aggressively   
AG: You mean after we talked the first time?  
GA: Yes  
AG: Uh.  
AG: No.  
GA: Vriska  
AG: Yes.  
GA: Apologize  
AG: How do you know I said anything horri8le?  
GA: Hm Well Lets Look At Your Past Actions  
GA: Remind Me Exactly How Things Went On The Meteor  
GA: And As A Follow Up Question How Long Did You Have Gamzee Locked In The Fridge  
AG: Fuuuuuuuuck.  
AG: I did let him out when we got to the new Earth. Doesn’t that count for anything?  
GA: You Were Going To Drop It And I Quote In The Fucking Ocean Or Something  
GA: Im Sorry But You Receive No Positive Points For That  
AG: Fuck.  
GA: Exactly  
GA: Do You Regret What You Said  
AG: Nope.  
GA: Do You Think It Hurt Him  
AG: Noooooooope.  
AG: ...  
AG: Your long silence is 8othering me.  
AG: kanaya, for Skaia’s s8ke.  
AG: OK8Y FINE. It was fucking mean and terri8le of me and I’m an awful person.  
AG: Happy?  
GA: Not Even A Bit  
GA: Apologize  
GA: Or Im Getting The Two Of You An Auspistice  
AG: Shit, is that why your memo upd8d earlier?  
GA: Yes  
GA: And Youre Banned From That One By The Way  
AG: HOLY SHIT  
AG: IS THAT THE MEMO I INVADED LIKE A MONTH AGO?  
AG: Holy shit.  
GA: So You Remember That Then  
AG: Yes.  
AG: 8ut you were seriously talking about me and Gamzee? I never would have guessed!  
GA: Well That Was The Point  
AG: Alright.  
AG: Just to make sure...   
GA: Yes  
AG: After I apologize and fix the fallout of my temper tantrum, you’ll hang around for a while, right?  
AG: I mean, as my moirail.  
AG: 8ecause I’d like that.  
GA: Yes I Will  
AG: Gr8!!!!!!!!  
AG: I’ll do that then.  
AG: And pro8a8ly stop talking to the clown moron entirely! That’d 8e nice.  
GA: Glad To Hear It  
AG: <>  
GA: ...   
GA: <>  


\-- grimAuxiliatrix [GA] ceased trolling arachnidsGrip [AG] --  



End file.
